Sunday, December 26, 2004

How to Play Cards

When you are playing cards it would be a bad idea to go up against Keith when he is "all in" on the first hand.  I know that it seems unlikely that he would have four eights, but then again, he might.  If he does have four of a kind then you would quickly find yourself on the sidelines if you don't buy in again.
After you have the spent more of your money buying in again, then you may be able to save face by forcing another player, let's say Todd, to lose all his money and then buy in again.  If you have done it then you are obviously pretty slick, but if not, then Keith has done it and you just barely managed to stay out of the whole thing.  if you can, then you should get the lead on Keith so that you are least get all of your money back and make a few dollars. 
Yes, I actually did that.
When the game starts again with more people.  It would be a bad idea to give Myka ten dollars because she will lose it immediately.  When she does at least she will keep you entertained with funny songs and anecdotes while the game continues.
In the second game, the next person out would probably be Gary.  He would buy in twice more even though it is obvious that he doesn't have the knack to say in the game.  If he lost  his chips three times over in the space of the same thirty minutes then he should probably learn his lesson.  He doesn't though, and we have to force him to stop.  He deals badly for most of the rest of the game.
Andrea would be the next to go out.  She would begin to make bad bets because she really wants to go home.  Her bad bets would prove to be profitable at first because she would get lucky, but ultimately, she would lose.  she doesn't care though, she just likes donating money to the other players.
Sadly, Keith would be the next one out of the game.  His girlfriend, who started out as a relatively sweet person would unfortunately, get taken by the hateful lust of competitive play.  It is as if the horns sprout directly from her head, and her claws outstretched as she took her boyfriends last chip.
So the game would be down to me, and the newly born devil.  She and I would have similar hands, but the truth is, that once her boyfriend is out of the room, she is more susceptible bad decision.  I mean she would actually be making a good one with a flush in her last hand, but a flush with an ace high in your hand would quiet the feeling of hope.
No hope.
In the end, I suppose that you would be the winner.



  1. It's Keith. Look, I wouldn't have went all in and lost had I not been allowed to buy back in once like WE ALL AGREED ON! I wouldn't have bet so crazy and miss out on the cash. But, no, Little Baby was too drunk and tired to stay up that late, so I quit to not make him cry. WAAAH! Don't cry, little baby!

    But to bring that up I look like the baby. Fuck that shit. I would have destroyed Mr. Movie Star. (If I have to hear one more fuckin' Eddie Murphey story... "He's still got it!" Okay, Victor. Okay.) And here's another thing: If we didn't feed him candy canes all night, he'd cry. Literally. What a pussy.

    I'd like to be happy for him. I'm not a sore loser. It's just that, well, if you met him, you know.

    He's got a cool girlfriend, but once she realizes what a baby Mr. "I'm a Movie Star" is, it'll end. And that's when I'll invite him over for consolation. And poker. And Arnold Swarzeneggar stories ain't gone save you then, my "friend".

  2. Hey, I have plenty of stories about Joe Pantaliano and Jason Lee. Please try to be current with your insults and let's not forget, I've got your cash.


  3. Anonymous8:02 PM

    I think, I debate, I respond. Carla