Oops, my bad!

Seems that my mother found out I was moving to LA through this Blog! I am a bad son, sorry mom..

I think that I am going to go and start the process of getting my license on Monday. I don't know how to drive, yes that's true, but I will drive!

Victor

Hey everyone, just checking in to let you know that very soon I will be moving to LA!

Yep, it's about time. I continually have to either make packages for LA or fly out there so now I am about to make it all happe for real.

So expect a very large party as a personal send off and then expect to see nothing but heels and asses.

Do you know what that means? Are you from the south?

Victor

Man has it been too long or what? Well in the most recent news, I was up for a role in a Martib short movie and I didn't land it. Luckily I have two other projects that have been green lighted. Sometimes it's weird trying to act for a living, but most of the time it's the bomb-diggity.

Get Puff to translate.

Victor

Good afternoon I say!

Well if you haven't geard, the Cartoon Network has released a new version of He-Man. Yep Prince Adam, Cringer, Tigra, the entire gang is back. Unfortunately, they still have Skeletor being a big crazy. He's a git a big muscly body and a skeleton head. Isn't that a little weird?

And who named him skeletor?

Finally saw one our photo yesterday. I really liked the movie a lot. Some people didn't like it as much. They are wrong.

Also, if you don't like tron then you are wrong as well.

Diid anyone out there dislike Reign of Fire? Wrong!

But if you didn't like some of my movies, that's okay...

Sniffle.

Excuse me for giveing you so many bar stories. In actuality I barely drink, but on days like today I teach class and then do two shows so that pretty much fills up my day.

At the end of such a day, I go and hang out with my friends at the 'ol bar or what not. That makes for some fun. I only had orange juice with seven-up tonight, but that didn't stop me from getting loud with a table of my friends and singing the praises of "putting yo thangs on the table" That phrase was edited alittle bit for the kids.

At one point we all took a picture to gether. I couldn't look at the camera because one of the women in the picture decided it would be a good idea to expose her boob while the picture was being taken. If you ask me, it was a good idea.

I know that I should have been looking at the camera, but I just couldn't turn my head away.

I am a child in a man 's body. Come and get it ladies.

Yikes.

Tonight whie in a bar a Brazillian woman cornered me in a conversaton. Apparently, she wanted to talk about how much fun it is to hang out with "young" people because all they talk about is sex.

She was about forty-five.

She aid, and I quote. " You guys don't have as much fun with sex as my generation, cause you have to have sex with condoms cause of all the disease."

"We can be creative." I said.

"Yeah, but nothing is more fun than having sex with a condom!"

At that moment, her penis snapped off and fell out of the bottom of her pantsleg.

Just because I wnet out to an eighties partry tonight... That doesn't mean that I'm a dork.

I believe that I disappointed a friend of mine when I wasn;t interested in dancing to culture club. I like listening to them, but theres something about the plodding beat of boy george that doesn't turn my crank.

Even though I'm sure that he's turned many inhis time.

Word.

Today I was taking a shower and the shower curtain fell.

Instinctively I covered myself. Now I feel stupid because I live alone.

Today I wrote a joke that ends with Arnold Scwarzennegger playing Marco Polo. I tried it out and it seemed to go pretty well.

Not very interesting huh?

I do have big news, but I can't tell you just yet. Soon though... soon.

Spooky.

I heard from my downstairs neighbors that they found my website.

I came home today to the sweet sounds of a kegger going on downstairs. Um, keggers rock! I never really spent more than three minutes with my downstairs neighbors until today. I wish I had.

They have a garden and a grill, and they are both pretty.

Yesterday, the screening was a wild success. Now I really don't know what that means... but I knows it's supposed to be good.

In a theater seating 400 people there were about three hundred and fifty. Everyone seemed to have a great time. I particularly enjoted the fries and root beer that I had snuck into the theater.

I know that's wrong, but really, there's nothing more fun than watching a great film and chowing down on illegal food.

Good grief. Today is the day of a screening of Hacks. Hacks is a great movie that makes some people angry. We'll see what happens today.

I'll let you know.

If I ever get the chance to eat ribs like I did tonight I will be happy all the time.

Look I know this doesn't make any sense to you, but it's really the fault of Microsoft for giving me acess to computers late at night when I am less likely to make any sense.

As a reward for sticking through this far Ill let you know that my favorite movie is TRON.

What?

Strangely enough, today was the first day I ever recieved a request in the mail for a signed 8x10. that made me very happy as I slowly climb up the acting ladder.

I rode the train home today with two other comics. Guess what went wrong.

I just pretended one of my friends was dead, while he was in the room.

Oh yeah, during my stand up set tonight, the guy running the sound turned on public enemy in the middle of one of my jokes. I then proceeded into going into "I'm lampin" a choice little number by Flava Flav.

Dude wore a clock on his neck to show that time was running out on the white man.

I am up way too late and I am rather sleepy. I'm the kind of tired where my teeth hurt. Is that just me?

So tonight, I ran on out to a local pub and realized how futile the whole idea of dating is. I mean after a while you just start running into the same faces over and over again. It's not to say that I've dated everyone that I've met, but it sure feels like ther's no one new out there.

Note: This may be a result of latent feelings after breaking up with my girlfriend.

Geez, i don't really know what a blog is. A lot of my friends have them so I guess I'm just jumping on the old bandwagon. ut I believe in that bandwagin yo.

More to come fatso.