Fahrenheit 9/11

I saw it!

 

I saw Fahrenheit today and I was happy and sad.

 

I was happy because I got a chance to see marvelous film that really shows America at its best and worst.  America at its worst because of all the questionable things that went on for many years, and at its best because there are many places in the world where a film as slanted against the existing government would not see the light of day.

 

I have a real problem with a film that id modeled after the documentary format that spoon feeds you emotion, but I appreciate the fact that this movie is definitely going to see a much larger and more diverse audience than would have ever seen this type of film in the past.  There are going to be quite a few people that will look at the entire 9.11 experience in a whole new way.

 

After the movie I kissed someone.

 

I guess all the death is a turn on for some chicks.*

 

 

*This was a joke.

________________
www.bestalbino.com

Bowl to the beat yo!

I just went bowling! 

 

I love to bowl, especially since I just got a few free lessons when I was working on a film that is based around me bowling.  Yeah, I will post it later, but the real treat is that I have learned to bowl better than I have ever bowled in my life!

 

I went bowling with a friend and it was an experience unlike any other time I have ever been out bowling.  The alley that we went to blared loud hip hop music while we were bowling.  Not only did it energize us while we were bowling, it allowed us to bowl and then dance for a bit while we were waiting for our ball to come back in the return.

 

Of all the songs that I heard while we were bowling, the best song to dance to while the ball was on its way back was "Sex Machine" by James Brown.

 

Try it, unless you are lame.
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www.bestalbino.com

Bonnie McFarlane

I think she's funny.  There were other funny people on Last Comic Standing, but not other people that everyone calls a bitch.

 

I'm just throwing support her way, not that it helps.

 

Last Comic Standing

Yeah, I saw last comic standing last night and I felt good and bad.

 

A lot of the comics who had made it to the final round were friends of mine.  There were quite a few comics who did well and then didn't get to be in the house and apparently there was a bit of an upset because of that.  Truth is, the people that did get into the house were not necessarily the comics that I would have chosen, but ultimately, that doesn't matter at all because I am not in charge.  From the show it kind of looks like Dan Natterman really got the short end of the stick.  That guy is funny!  By the way, if you ever want to insult a comic to their face then tell them that they are funny, but when you say funny make funny sound like "phony" as if you were saying it ebonically.

 

I declined to even audition for Last Comic Standing this year because I thought that it would be silly to wait in a long line. 

 

Now I wish I had.

________________
www.bestalbino.com

The good and bad

I hopt the blog thing doesn't bunch all of this up. I have been trying a
new thing where I can send my posts to an email address and then they are
all posted on my blog automatically. Unfortunately, it seems to either put
line breaks where I don't want them or to make the entire post one
paragraph. What the?

One of my friends just brought the girl of his dreams back home. Me next
right...

I had one of the best shows that I think that I have ever had in a while
tonight, so I think that it is fitting that I remind you all of the worst
show that has ever graced the television.

I think this show was on for like a week before it got cancelled.

Awful

Plot Summary for
"Secret Diary of Desmond Pfeiffer, The"
Desmond Pfeiffer (the P is pronounced) was a black British gentleman who was
run out of England after being accused of cheating at cards. He takes a job
as butler to a perpetually horny Abraham Lincoln in the White House during
the Civil War.

1. A.O.L.: Abe On-Line
gs: Teresa Barnwell (Hillary Clinton) Christian J. Meoli (Telegraph
Operator) Terry Kiser () Len Lesser ()

Lincoln engages in "telegraph sex" with a woman he's never seen.


b: 05-Oct-1998 pc: 40227-002 w: Jim Gerkin d: Matthew Diamond


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2. Up, Up and Away
gs: Stephen Tobolowsky (Early) Curtis Armstrong (Forrest)

Desmond, Nibblet and the President wind up trapped behind enemy lines after
a freak accident with an observation balloon, and President Lincoln must
dress in drag to escape Southern territory. Meanwhile, General Grant tries
sobriety.


b: 12-Oct-1998 pc: 40227-003 w: Marc Abrams and Michael Benson


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3. Saving Mr. Lincoln
gs: Wendy Worthington (Queen Victoria) Roland Kickinger (Lars)

When Lincoln falls ill before a meeting with Queen Victoria, Mary Todd
decides to hire a body double to impersonate the president. Little does the
body double know that she's got another use in mind for him.


b: 19-Oct-1998 pc: 40227-004 w: Brian Pollack & Mert Rich d: Matthew Diamond


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4. Once Upon a Mistress
gs: Jack Salvatore, Jr. (Young Abe Lincoln)

When foreign dignitaries bring their mistresses to visit, President Lincoln
finds temptation in a gift from a foreign dignitary. Meanwhile, Nibblet
concocts a tonic for Mary's migraines.


b: 26-Oct-1998 pc: 40227-007 w: Brian Boulware d: Matthew Diamond


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5. Pilot


After managing to get himself hired as President Lincoln's butler, Desmond
Pfeiffer schemes to return to his native England.


b: UNAIRED pc: 40227-001

NOTE: Scheduled to air on October 5, 1998. African-American groups (most of
whom didn't even bother to watch the series) complained 'till the cows came
home, and UPN--after recutting it more than once--shelved it.

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6. Pigeon English





b: UNAIRED pc: 40227-005


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7. Kidnapped
gs: Beverly Leech (Mrs. Robert E. Lee) Glenn Shadix (Robert E. Lee) Rue
McClanahan (Lucille)

When Confederate soldiers kidnap Mrs. Lincoln, Grant retaliates by
kidnapping Robert E. Lee's wife.


b: UNAIRED pc: 40227-006 w: Ron Nelson and Mark Steen d: Matthew Diamond

NOTE: Chi went on the Roseanne talk show and stated that he could care less
what people thought of the show and he refused to meet with the people that
wanted the show cancelled. The next day the series was cancelled.
originally scheduled to air on 2 Nov 1998


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8. School Daze
gs: Ezra Buzzington (George Axelrod)




b: UNAIRED pc: 40227-008 d: Matthew Diamond

NOTE: Guest star Ezra Buzzington's website has some interesting
behind-the-scenes details on this episode.

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9. Guess Who's Coming to Dinner





b: UNAIRED pc: 40227-009


________________
www.bestalbino.com
-- scary cute

Mom?

Where are you?

I had a good day

You may or may not know that I feel kind of lax in my ability to make new
friends in LA since I have been here. I have tried, but for the most part I
have been constantly bombarded with people who are not quite complete. When
I say complete, I mean that they don't seem to have full command of their
faculties. For me, that is a deal breaker.

I hung out today with a friend of mine whose company I enjoy a whole lot.
If it were up to me that would be my job.

How can I make that happen?

It's a different world.

Salut!

I am working very hard right now on my writing in a way that I never have.
I actually feel exhilarated when I am at the keyboard of my computer.
weird.

I am about to do something pretty cool to my blog, I think I will invite my
entire family to post.

Just in case

You thought that I was not going to share the goods with you, I am going to
the premiere of CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK tonight and I hope to have a great
time as I love sci-fi movies.

Hi Son,

I was doing biting commentary? I was just making an observation! I think you'll be better off continuing to write your own jokes. However, I'm sure the other family members and I will still be good inspiration from time to time.

When are you going to reveal more news about yourself? Of course I'm curious, but it seems that your fans are really waiting.

Hi mom!

I understand what you are saying about the TV land awards. You are actually making biting commentary on the stars of yesterday. It's almost like you are writing comedy. I may ask you to write some jokes for me in the future.

Right now I am sitting in my room with a woman who is strumming my guitar badly and singing nicely. NO nothing is going on. I did a lot of Karaoke tonight. I sang "welcome to the jungle", "That's the way I like it" by KC and the sunshine band. I remember playing their 8 track tape . That must have been when I was a fetus.

Tomorrow I have a lot more work to do on a script for this company.

Woo-hoo!

Victor

Hi Son. Sounds like your Aspen trip is one of your best experiences so far this year. I enjoyed hearing about the other celebs you ran into.

Now for my excitement: I watched the TV Land Awards this week!

Apparently, once you've been on a long-running tv series you can come on the tv awards show and perform and be really good or not so good - It just doesn't seem to matter as long as the audience gets to see you again!

ASPEN in a nutshell.

Flew on the plane with Jack Black. He was not
into being talked to so I didn't.

Arrived on Tuesday and performed for 700 people in
the ballroom. WONDERFUL SHOW.


I ate a lot of food as my hotel had free
breakfast, free lunch, free beer and
wine every afternoon, and free long distance.
What? I want to move to this place.

Day two, wednesday i went to see a bunch of shows
and performed that night. GREAT SET, but not as
crazy as day one. Met lots of industry people and
had fun. Went out to a bar with people from
comedy central and met a guy who got gayer the
more that he drank.

Wednesday, another set, I also got dissed by Chris
Rock. I think he may have never even considered a
black albino, cause he was not into saying hello.
Hung w' Paully shore. Not bad time, he was nice
to me. Did a set and it was also GOOD, but not
crazy fantastic. I may be being hard on myself
because I got tons of attention after this set.

I had no set on Thursday but they added me to a
show at the Wheeler Opera House where I open for
Louis CK and Joe Rogan. Lots of industry and
maybe 2000 people there. Again WONDERFUL SET!
This show generated the most
"business" fro me. I may get into the details
later. Louis told me he loved some of my jokes
which made me melt because I love him.

Friday I meet Robert Schimmel and my set is
MEDIOCRE. People still seem to like it, but I am
not so happy. Anyway, whatever, I spent the night
kicking myself for not making the most of every
moment at the festival. This was also the night
that they were judging so not the best move for me.

Saturday, I have a kick ass set again and I manage
to make a guy laugh so hard that he threw up his
hands and hit his girlfriend in the face. I am
going to go for that from now on. I had such a
blast at the festival. At The after party, I was
stalked by a rich woman that looked like a monster.

Yeah, i sang in the choir so what? I had an extremely hogh voice and I could sing green sleeves like nobody's business.

V

Ha!! Evidently Victor is away performing and I've been left "home alone" with the blog and trusted to do whatever I please.

Hello Victor's audience. Did you know that as a boy Victor, along with his brother and sister, sang in the Children's Choir. That's right - a former choir boy. I know he's immensely successful but I thought he was going to seminary.